Wednesday, February 17, 2010

A Sir and His boy

I will be facilitating a discussion about the Sir/boy dynamic for Seattle Men in Leather's Tribal Instincts this Friday, February 19th, from 8 pm - 10 pm.

I believe the Sir/boy bond is foundational to everything we do in the post-modern Leather Tribe. Although the application of protocols may differ today, still, the dynamic has not changed much since I first came out in 1985.

I consider my boys an extension of myself. I expect people to treat them with the same respect they treat me. And if I learn that someone has either mistreated one of my boys or spoken disrespectfully to one of them, I become as defensive as a lion.

As a Sir, I NEVER tell my boys to be quiet or treat them as property, although I can use strict tactics as a disciplinarian. I especially like listening to what my alpha boy gabe has to say. I often use him as my counselor, my confidant. The depth of this trust is near sacred to me.

I invite you to attend Tribal Instincts on Friday to discuss what it means to train a boy. This more than anything else makes what we do different from the hetero and pan kink communities. It is the heart of our Tribe.

1 comment:

  1. I like what you say here a lot, Sir. I do believe that a Sir and his boy are an extension of each other. It is much different now that in the past, boys have a stronger role.

    I do find that many boys in the current tribe do lack some basic knowledge of protocol. How to behave in public, for one. As an extension of the Sir if the boy acts out it can not only disprect his Sir, but also give a bad impression of the Sir.

    There are some basics that could help a lot of current tribal boys: how to negotiate protocol with their Dom; how their actions reflect on their leather family; how to be a boy outside of the bedroom; etc.

    I know protocol is different in all regions and relationships, but I do believe some basics are the same. I do believe that connection, when strong and nurtured with knowledge, can be amazingly strong and spiritual.

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