More than an elaborate masturbation

My Leather is more than an elaborate masturbation. It is the heart of who I am.

Recently I came face to face with my Buddhist spiritual practice and Leather. As I struggled to explain to my Zen teachers regarding the responsibilities I felt as a Sir relative to my boys, I felt compelled to walk away. After fifteen years in the sangha, I left.

I anticipated that leaving the sangha would also be a struggle but I found just the opposite. As I sit in mediation in the morning, I feel freed from the constraints of Zen. The idea that one sits in meditation to know oneself is wonderful. In Leather, we play to know ourselves. In play, the social masks are dropped. Too much energy to maintain them when play becomes heavy and all one can do is hold on to a thread of awareness to make it through the scene.

I am a Sir 24/7. My boys understand this. As they sit beside me in meditation, they know that I will continue to watch out for them. They do not drop their collars at he door of the Dharma Hall.